And i must agree with Joni Mitchell… “it’s cloud illusions i recall. I really don’t know clouds at all.”
Her song captures something:
“Both Sides Now (by Joni Mitchell)
Bows and flows of angel hair and ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons everywhere, i’ve looked at clouds that way.
But now they only block the sun, they rain and snow on everyone.
So many things i would have done but clouds got in my way.
I’ve looked at clouds from both sides now,
From up and down, and still somehow
It’s cloud illusions i recall.
I really don’t know clouds at all.
Moons and junes and ferris wheels, the dizzy dancing way you feel
As every fairy tale comes real; i’ve looked at love that way.
But now it’s just another show. you leave ’em laughing when you go
And if you care, don’t let them know, don’t give yourself away.
I’ve looked at love from both sides now,
From give and take, and still somehow
It’s love’s illusions i recall.
I really don’t know love at all.
Tears and fears and feeling proud to say “i love you” right out loud,
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds, i’ve looked at life that way.
But now old friends are acting strange, they shake their heads, they say
Something’s lost but something’s gained in living every day.
I’ve looked at life from both sides now,
From win and lose, and still somehow
It’s life’s illusions i recall.
I really don’t know life at all.”
The one thing I can say about clouds, is that they mostly float in a blue sky. Against a clear blue backdrop. At least where i am.
And they are diverse. They billow, they puff, they streak, they wisp, they dally, they sneak, they hover. But are they devious?
Are they fickle? Moody? Playful? Significant?
I cannot say. Because – like love and life, I really do not know clouds at all.
Just as i begin to think i am reading something really personal and helpful in the clouds, my message appears to change shape… and change shape some more… and then just…. evaporate…. into nothingness. I search and search, sure of the notion that I will see ‘it’ written in the sky, the clouds. But I haven’t. Not yet.
I love clouds. I love the word ‘clouds’!
Their gentle distance reassures me. Their evasiveness puzzles me. But always, for me, they will shuffle into the category of beauty – sheer, untainted beauty.
‘So many things I would have done. But clouds get in my way…’